Walla Walla Wallop!

Bill Krieger... Apr 26, 1999

Thank you Walla Walla. The Banger slapped West Chicago silly last week 353-277. Big Dog, Shareef and the boys broke the Beater 10 game winning streak in convincing style. With Seattle (G Payton) and Cleveland (S Kemp) struggling to make the NBA playoffs, West Chicago may have another beating in its very near future. For now, West Chicago falls to 10-1 in a tie with Aruba for the best record in the NIBL. No longer perfect, Don Fenton also falls as the source of all irritation to your humble author.

I'm not sure how it would work, but if I could make fun of Aruba (myself) I would. The mighty Thong pulled out another last second (and two point) victory last week over the unlucky Vegas Vermin, 272-270. I know the Thong are 10-1, but cracks are beginning to show with injuries to Juwan Howard and Briant Grant, and Scottie Pippen's apparent lack of interest in anything except adult beverages... and don't forget the mid-season trade that launched Stephon Marbury out of the playoff scene. Aruba's motto is definitely "better lucky than good", but that didn't seem to work too well in the playoffs last year. Stay tuned.

You thought last week was wild... The ever-popular games of next week...

  • Joliet at Elk Grove - The once-mighty Joliet Byrd meet the once-sickly Elk Grove Cougar for second place and a ticket to the Western Conference playoffs. In a tale of two cities, Joliet has lost 3 of its last 4 as the Miami duo and NBC's favorite child, Kobe Bryant, have come back the Earth, while Elk Grove has jump on C-Web's back to a three victory winning streak. If Joliet wins, they take second place... if Elk Grove wins, they take control going into the last week. Of course, Don Fenton awaits the winner.
  • Aruba at Baghdad - This meeting features the top two teams in the East, but with two very different motivations. Baghdad maintains a one game lead over a pack of 4 other Eastern Conference teams and needs this one desperately. The Thong clinched the East last week and is looking to throw the CorssDresser back into the pack... a first place spoiler?
  • Manila at Matunuck - Pretty simple math... the loser will go 6-6 and can take the summer off, while the winner stays in the hunt for a playoff spot. By the way, both these teams have rocking playoff teams. Who dug up the DogEaters from their early grave anyway?

Wild wild east? The battle for second place in the Eastern Conference is a knot. Baghdad (7-4) has a one game edge over Cap City, Manila, Matunuck, and Vegas (all 6-5), but the CrossDressers have the toughest remaining schedule with games against Aruba and Manila. It looks like we're going to use them there fancy new tiebreakers (head-to-head competition is first and then head-to-head points), so here's a little table for you... It lists the head-to-head competition results and point total between the five teams vying for second place in the East:

  Bag Cap Man Mat Veg
Bag --- L, 279 (week 12) W, 278 W, 291
Cap W, 302 --- W, 292 (week 12) L, 279
Man (week 12) L, 280 --- (week 11) W, 297
Mat L, 258 (week 12) (week 11) --- L, 282
Veg L, 265 W, 290 L, 278 W, 290 ---

My expert interpretation of this... got me? If Baghdad runs the table, then their 9-4 record will take second place. If the CrossDresser stumble, then 8-5 is likely the price of admission. That means that any losses by the other four teams will likely bounce them from consideration. After that, let's just hope it doesn't come down to the coin toss.

Lastly, some miscellany...

  • If you want more Matunuck fun and pictures, check out www.rhodetrip.com
  • Any single parents out there? I was a single parent for ten years, so let's pretend, OK? What would the cause of these Colorado shootings have been if these numbnuts had been the products of single family households? I'll bet a dollar that Marilyn Manson, the Internet, "Natural Born Killers", "Basketball Diaries" and black trenchcoats would be completely off the hook if these kids had one crappy parent instead of two.
  • By the way, Marilyn's site rocks... www.marilynmanson.net
  • Does anyone else think that Cade McNown has buster written all over him? Maybe it's just my Wanny hangover.

yow, bill

PS - Word for the day: peey

peey - pronounced: "pee-ee"; usage: "at 2:30 last night, Ty wet through his diaper, his jammies, his blanket and his sheet, and everything seemed quite peey"